The Key to Forgiving Others

One day Peter asked Jesus how many times he had to forgive someone. Peter thought that forgiving seven times was pretty good. “No!” Jesus replied, “seventy times seven!” (Matthew 18:22). Then Jesus gave an illustration showing how God looks on our responsibility to forgive:

One day, a king was going over his accounts, settling old debts. He saw that one of his servants owed him millions of dollars. The king ordered the servant brought before him. When he arrived, the king demanded that the servant pay every penny. But the amount was far beyond the servant’s ability to pay, so the king ordered the man and his family and all his possessions be sold to pay the debt. The servant fell before the king and pleaded for mercy. The king felt pity and forgave him this tremendous debt.

That is such a wonderful picture of God’s mercy. We are like the servant who could not pay the debt. But God, in His mercy, took pity on us and erased our sin debt completely.

But what did this servant do? He found a fellow servant who owed him a few thousand dollars and demanded payment. Just imagine. He came from the throne room where he had been extended so much mercy and grabbed his friend by the throat and demanded payment! The friend begged for mercy. But the servant would not forgive him and had him thrown into prison.

When the other servants saw the injustice, they went to the king and reported what had happened. The king was angry! He called in the servant and demanded to know why the man had acted so harshly toward his friend when he himself had been forgiven so much. Then the king commanded the servant be thrown into prison until he had paid every penny.

God gave His only Son to die in our place. That is mercy beyond comprehension, beyond description. How, then, can we ever refuse to give mercy to others when we have received so much mercy ourselves? What others may have done to you does not compare with what God has forgiven you. That is why God expects us to have mercy on others. To the degree that we show mercy to the poor, the wretched, and the guilty, we are like God. The lesson is clear: the merciful shall obtain mercy. And who among us is not a candidate for more of God’s mercy?

Our Need for Mercy Helps Us Serve Others

Just like the unforgiving servant, sometimes the hardest place to extend mercy is the area where God has given us the most mercy—our area of weakness.

Ed DeWeese came home one afternoon to find that thieves had gone through his home. The TV, stereo equipment, and jewelry were missing—about $3,000 worth. He called his wife, Beth, at work and she rushed home. The police arrived and took a report. Because the DeWeeses had just moved in, they had not taken out homeowner’s insurance. After the policemen left, they prayed, “Lord, we have no insurance and cannot afford to replace these things. Please return them to us.”

That is when Ed’s situation really hit him. He was an ex-offender. He had gone to jail for embezzlement—sophisticated burglary. He said to Beth, “We must first forgive.”

After the thief had been arrested and released on bond, Ed asked a police officer to take him to the offender’s home. When Ed met the man who had robbed him, he said, “I’m the man you ripped off. But brother, I forgive you in the name of Jesus.”

Ed continued to visit the thief and gave a Bible to his little brother who had assisted in the crime. Soon, the robber told the police where the stolen things were hidden, and the officers recovered the DeWeeses’s belongings. When the young man pleaded guilty to burglary, Ed testified in his behalf. He then helped the young man find a job. And Ed says, “Best of all, he and his brother did receive Christ as Savior.”^[i]

Our past failures can make us more sensitive to those who need mercy in the very areas in which we once needed mercy. We can minister to others in a more meaningful way because we understand and have experienced the reality of God’s mercy in our area of weakness.

Mercy Means Letting Go of Old Hurts

Corrie ten Boom encountered a situation in which her willingness to forgive was challenged.

During 1944, Corrie experienced the horror of life under Hitler’s National Socialists in the Ravensbrück concentration camp. Grim guards in blue uniforms and caps bearing the Nazi swastika stood in a line with leather crops swinging from their belts. The emaciated women dressed in prison garb worked long hours every day under the watchful eye of these godless tormentors. Corrie’s sister, Betsie, died in Ravensbrück, a victim of the tortuous conditions.

In 1947, after the war, Corrie spoke to a group of Germans in a sparsely furnished Munich church basement. Her mission was to help those who were ravaged by the war. During her talk, she said, “I have a home in Holland for victims of the war. Those who have been able to forgive their former enemies have been able to rebuild their lives, no matter what the physical scars. Those, however, who have nursed their bitterness remain invalids. We, as Christians, have every reason to forgive each other, for our God richly lavishes His mercy on us—if we only ask Him.”

When she finished her talk, she was approached by a balding, heavyset man in a gray overcoat, a brown felt hat clutched between his nervous hands. Horror filled her as she realized he had been one of those guards who had abused Betsie in the camp. His name was Joseph.

Joseph thrust out his hand. “A fine message, Fräulein! How good it is to know that, as you say, all our sins are at the bottom of the sea!”

Dumbfounded, Corrie did not take his hand.

He went on, “You mentioned Ravensbrück in your talk. I was a guard there. But since that time, I have become a Christian. I know that God has forgiven me for the cruel things I did there, but I would like to hear it from your lips as well. Fraulein, will you forgive me?”

Corrie remembered how he had pushed Betsie with the butt of his gun. She looked down at his outstretched hand. She whispered to herself, “Jesus, help me.” Her hand slowly moved toward his. Their hands touched and God flooded her heart with genuine forgiveness as she finally vigorously shook his hand. With tears in her eyes, she said, “I forgive you, brother...with all my heart.” Corrie didn’t have the ability to forgive on her own. The pain was too deep. Her part was to be willing to forgive and ask God to help her forgive. God’s part was to fill her heart with forgiveness. Corrie experienced God’s mercy in the moment she chose to extend His mercy.

God loves us no matter what we have done. He forgives us when we ask Him. No sin is too big for His ocean of forgiveness. Since God richly lavishes His mercy on us, we must show mercy to one another. And that means choosing by faith, like Corrie, to let go of all those old hurts caused by others, asking God to enable us to forgive by the power of His Spirit.

By Bill Bright, GOD, Who Are You Anyway?

©2018 Copyright Bright Media Foundation

^[i] Adapted from Ed DeWeese, “The Right Man to Rob,” Worldwide Challenge, January/February 1995, 5.